How Infomercials are like Star-Trek

Here’s my ba-doom-ching submission for today.
As I was sitting in the studios of home.fm, flipping through the stations on the only TV equipped with cable, I came across an infomercial for the Space Bag on channel 61 and a rerun of the classic Star Trek on 62.  I couldn’t help but identify the similarities between the shows:

•  Cardboard Sets 
• Wooden acting with over-response to stimulus 
• Seems too good to be true (George Foreman grill excluded)
• On at roughly the same time (between the cherished 2AM-6AM window)
• Both contain copious amounts of Shatner
• You don’t want to admit to anyone that you actually stopped to watch it
• Scientist-like characters with shady credentials speaking lingo that “we just wouldn’t understand”
• Seems unbelievable, at least for the first 20 minutes.  Then you’re really thinking about what it would be like to have your own Transporter/Ginsu Knife

Am I missing any? 

It’s so cold…

• You grab an ice pack on the way out to keep your hands warm
• Thinsulate stock is slated to rise over 9,000 percent.  That’s nearly 5,000 percent celsius.
• You need to ditch the iPod ear buds for the much warmer 70’s earphones
• To make that lunch appointment across town, you need to start your car before dawn
• You actually feel compelled to hug your furnace
• You don’t even have to think about it when a friend “Triple-dog-dares” you to stick your tongue to a flagpole
• It’s actually fun to breathe through your nose
• Your thermometer reads “let me in”

There’s my slapstick material submission for the day.  Ba-doom-ching.  The 5 degree weather was an inspiration. Vote for your favorite, if you dare.